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so much has happened in the last few weeks. i've been cast in a production of 12th night, so've been going to work every day and off to rehearsal at night. i've been driving around new york city like crazy. inever thought i would drive here, and all the sudden i am. i auditioned for a rock musical a few weeks ago. i haven't done a musical audition in years, so i was rather proud of myself that i decided to just go out and do it. i had fun, i did well, i didn't get called back- i don't think i look very jewish and that's what they were looking for. but i'm in another show right now so it doesn't matter.

i've been applying for 'real' jobs recently, as the temp market has seem to have dried up here in the city. i'm pretty choosy about where i want to go. an arts organization or a non-for-profit. i interviewed for a job at a cool non-for-profit company last week and they brought me back in to speak with the head of the company who is a very important lady in the industry. they are pretty hesistant about hiring an actor because it can be very risky for them- i could get a job and have to relocate somewhere the next day. but i think they think i'm the best person for the job because they called me up on monday and offered it to me. nad i am pretty scared to take on a permanant gig. i'm afraid that i will get so wrapped up in what is going on at my day job, that my dream, the reason i moved to new york in the first place, will fall to the wayside. the position is pretty time demanding, and my days will be filled, so no more 'free' time to work on 'me' things like running to auditon sor submitting my headshots and stuff. that will all have to be taken care of on my off time. which is how it should be, i know, but not what i'm used to. but i'm eager to jump into somehting new and the company is pretty awesome and i really believe in what they are doing and they are so progressive and it's a pretty perfect position for the save-the-world part of me. but still, i'm terrified of commiting to something.. what if i don't like it? what if they don't like me? what if the work is too hard and i keep on messing up? what if they hate me and make fun of me behind my back? what if i can't get out to auditions EVER AGAIN?!! so we talked about terms and i said i needed a night to 'sleep on it.' what to do what to do.

also

i'm redesigning our kitchen to be renovated into a 'green kitchen' this is fun and agonizing because i really have no idea what i'm doing and i have to talk to an architect tonight and pretend that i do. i'm so clueless.

also

my very best girlfriend is dating a celebrity and she is in la at this moment spending the month with him. how cool is that?!

also

my other very best girlfriend is going through some amazingly difficult times right now, and i'm so admiring her strength and ability to hold on and not let this send her to a 'bad place.'

i do love me some awesome girlfriends.