i never want to fly again

i've been flying a lot the last few weeks, with the holidays and such. i'm sick and tired of flying- i know all of you who travel for business, etc.. have no sympathy, but really, i never want to fly again. the weather has been terrible and each trip has been filled with white-knuckled turbulence. my last two flights have been completely blind landings because of rain and fog. my insides go crazy and i can feel my stomach producing that lovely stress-cocktail that plagues my skin and my energy levels for the next week. i try various breathing techniques, but nothing blocks that screaming in my head "the plane is going down and you are going to die!"

did i mention i have to fly back to ohio on thursday? fantastic.

kpr and i were on a cruise last week. his company sent all employees and significant others and we had a great time. we were supposed to go to cozomel, but never made it there- a passenger had a heart attack and we had to turn around and go back towards key west. they re-routed us through nassau island, the bahamas, but it was off season there and chilly and rainy. kpr and i had fun, though. i didn't get to show off my two new bathing suits (bikinis woo hoo!), but it was nice just spending time with him during the day and eating and relaxing and eating some more.

I've decided to start eating healthy again after the holidays. this is not a new year's resolution (i don't really believe in them), but something i have been meaning to do for a while, but realistically have been putting in off until after new years. i can't expect myself to give up wine and cheese during the wine and cheese season, now can i? i'm going to stop the dairy-alcohol-wheat craziness for about a month and give my system a rest. i can't give them up forever, but i know i can do it for a month. i'm going to the dr. tomorrow to get a hold on my asthma, which has been spinning out of control since september and going to start back up on supplements again. for a while i was taking so many vitamins and supplements, it drove me crazy and i just stopped everything. the cold weather is awful for my skin and lungs and immune system, so i know i gotta start taking the horse pills again.

its been great to get back to reading everyone's blog again- has helped put me in the holiday spirit. we don't have any decorations up this year because they are all in the storage space and we just haven't had the time to lug the ladder out and sort through all the stuff in storage- so no decorations- has made me a little sad, but i know that kpr has been so busy with work, he would do it if he had the time. i would get them out myself, but the ladder we have is sooooo heavy (whine) and i'd have to carry it upstairs and i know i would knock up all the walls that kpr has been working on all year. trust me, i would do it if i could.

hmm- just typing all that has made me want the decorations even more. poop.