crap soup

there is a hale and hearty soup shop in my building where i work. they hand out those little cards where you buy 10 soups get one soup free. i've been diligently visiting this soup shop throughout the winter, slowly but surely building up my soup count. last week, i finally reached my goal! ten soups! holy crap! that's awesome! i get free soup! free soup!! woohoo! i save up to six bucks! rock on! they just did a report on cbs news about soup places in new york with health code violations! my soup place was a featured unsanitary establishement! i've been eating crap soup for the last three months! it's a wonder i'm still alive!

somebody hold me.